I'm still trying to figure out if Oct 27 was a day from hell or if it's just something to learn from and laugh it off. I'll do this blog time-line style and try to figure out if I want to laugh or cry later.
8:45am: Wake up from an intense dream in which I snap on someone, push them to hit me first only to end up bashing their head into the ground, having my nose broken and throwing up blood while they end up unconscious.I have no clue what to think of this...except that there has never been ONE single person to ever push me to that edge...and somehow this person did.
9:00am-9:30am: Lay in bed in a soaking wet shirt from sweat gasping for air wondering what the hell just happened in my dream.
11:00am: Move on from the dream, shower, get dressed and get on the road to downtown to the garment district.
11:00am-12:30pm: Sit in traffic with strange windy but hot weather where neither having the window up NOR down seems to feel right. Get off the freeway (aka stopway) to get some food. Get back on the freeway, sit in more traffic.
12:30pm: Finally arrive in downtown, park and get going.
12:30pm-2:30pm: Operation "takeover" is in full research mode. A lot gets done in these hours. Everything we planned to get done actually gets done and we are able to run around Santee Alley just for the hell of it, shop a little, eat a hot dog(I opt out if one) and some chilli mango (I have one piece). This is important info for future reference.
2:45pm-3:00pm: Walk back to the car....reach for keys in my pocket....no keys. Search backback....no keys....search purse....no keys.
3:00pm: FUCK. I lost my car keys.
3:00pm-4:00pm: Trace back every single step of the last 3 hours....twice....no keys. Security, police, ganitors,sales people....not a soul has picked up my keys, or has reported them, or returned them to any authority. Great news...NOT.
4:00pm: Realizing this is now a lost cause we head back to my car (which I may remind you is a 1984 Cadillac El Dorado....I have (had) the only set of original keys that are now in someone else's pocket). Calling AAA in hopes of maybe getting towed to the house so I can deal with this later.
4:15pm: AAA lets me know they can have a locksmith come out and duplicate both the ignition and door keys (two different keys) AND they cover up to $100 in parts and labor. Sweet. Send them out please.
4:30pm: Locksmith arrives. Opens the door in all of 30 seconds. I'm thinking I may not even need a door key at this point. He gets out a set of about 20 keys that he proceeds to try one after another in the ignition in (both of our) hopes that one will match and we can both get on our marry way. No such luck. He informs me he will need to remove my steering wheel to get to the ignition mechanism to do his magic. Sure thing, batman, do what you gotta do...I'm gonna sit back and watch you do this because at this point I am tired, hungry and just want to sit down.
4:45pm-6:20pm: This is where I mention the fact that the lot in which we parked closes at 6:30pm SHARP, as it's so nicely written on the sign right in front of us. Everything that can go wrong DOES go wrong in the process of removing and replacing the steering wheel. my steering wheel seems to be the most supperest of all duper steering wheels ever made, bolts don't fit, screws get stripped, he has to re-thread some things while trying not to break anything in the process, the horn attachment is a pain in the ass that keeps popping out JUST as soon as he ALMOST finishes...fyi my car comes equipped with an air horn...so every time the fucking thing slipped, the entire parking structure is filled with the most alarming air horn, waking up half the neighborhood and some people in China. Did I mention that we are parked right above Santee Alley and some jackass is selling some kind of toy that sounds like nothing we'd ever heard...a weird mix between a crying child and an animal in dire need of a nap?! This is mixed in with a random sound of another sales person demonstrating what seems to be a tazer gun...between those three sounds, I'm now twitching at every sound I hear.
6:20pm: It's looking more and more like we may be spending the night in this parking structure, so I decide instead of also dying of hunger, I may as well go down the street for my second meal of the day....a hot dog. We walk down the street...and up the street...all hotdog vendors are closed. All restaurants are closed. Any form of food is CLOSED. I spot a vending machine so I can at least get some juice or some kind of sugar in my system...annnnd it's broken. Awesome. Well, I might as well go pee. Sure!....not so much. That's also closed.
6:25pm: Upon my return from my unsuccessful venture for food and pee break, Manuel lets me know he finally got everything back the way it needs to be, hands me two keys, takes $95, and we are fucking OUT of there with 3 minutes to spare before the lot closes for the night. Thank you Manuel.
6:28pm-8:15pm: Two words: FUCKING TRAFFIC. After about an hour and a half we finally get out of the nightmare that is Downtown Los Angeles traffic, and pull off the freeway to get something, ANYTHING to eat. Between the hunger and the exhaustion, the delirium had caught up with both me and LL. We are 2 seconds from crying as we are laughing hysterically and singing anything from Journey to Adam Lambert.
8:30pm: Stop. Drop. Roll. I literally stopped for 2 seconds as I dropped off LL lol I had about 3 more minutes of sanity left in me and i needed to keep it for the drive home. This is where I have to thank her for being there with me today, because without her and my Buspar prescription, I believe there would have been some bodies and a news report. Thank you, for, once again, keeping me sane through what seemed to be a bad nightmare.
8:40pm: Home. Shower. Rest.
9:00pm-present: Trying to figure out how I managed not to snap and re-enact my dream from last night. I have blisters on my toes, my face hurts from this stupid windy cold weather, my head is pounding from going WAAAAAAYYYY too long without food for being a hypoglycemic, my entire body is sore from walking for hours, my wallet hates me for spending an extra unnecessary $95, my brain hates me for being stupid and losing keys...and yet, I still feel really accomplished.
I'm gonna just call it a day. Lesson learned. Advil and happy pill....I am done with this day.
Two words
ReplyDeleteMe.tro.